My Story

For as long as I can remember rejection has always been my worst nightmare. In my neighborhood as a lil raging ADHD kid I was SUPER annoying - according to all the other kids. I hated it, I couldn't help who I was. I remember having a small group of girl friends in elementary school where they basically turned against me... mostly because I was annoying. I was just that kid. That fear of rejection really manifested a lot through out my life in different ways. As a teenager I used my body as a way to control that rejection - it worked... but did it really? It always felt like I wanted to be accepted by everyone, I just wanted to be liked. But who wouldn't? My energy was always put towards pleasing others, wanting to be liked, and my body.

It wasn't until one day in 2017 I decided to follow an art tutorial on YouTube (shout out Let's Make Art) that I realized how much I loved to paint. I also realized that I could actually be good at it if I wanted to... so I started painting and letting go of all the other demons that raged in my brain. I realized I could spend my time doing literally whatever I wanted - I could control my life by doing something enjoyable. I still forget sometimes that I can spend my free time doing things that bring me JOY, so I should. I feel like the luckiest person in the world to have found something that simply makes me happy, so I throw myself into it. I now struggle with the throws that is social media, consumerism, capitalism, and making money off my art - that is an ongoing battle. As someone who struggles with rejection not getting likes or views PAINS me, so I step back when I need to. My art is meant to connect me with others, to share myself. It's not about making money and paying bills and I can still dream of those things but focus on what my art does. I don't want my spirit crushed, so I need to nourish it.

That's what this space is about to me. Nourishing my soul, spirit, and mind. There are no branding rules here to convince you to purchase things from me. It's just me using it however I feel like it and hope you can connect to me - and if you can't that's a LIE U READ THIS FAR HAHA I CAUGHT YOU. we kinda connect don't we? love u